Comments on: An Affair to Remember http://mephistos.com/2009/12/13/an-affair-to-remember/ A medieval, agrarian, libertarian, green-living, alpha-geek's view on the world. Mon, 06 Feb 2012 15:51:00 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Cicilia http://mephistos.com/2009/12/13/an-affair-to-remember/comment-page-1/#comment-2243 Cicilia Mon, 14 Dec 2009 16:27:13 +0000 http://www.mephistos.com/?p=2097#comment-2243 I happen to agree with you completely. Yes, as smbush said, you can't choose when you will fall in love. However, I don't think that Hollywood should be romanticizing what is essentially cheating and making it seem like it's perfectly acceptable behavior. I also disagree that they didn't do anything wrong simply because they were not intimate. Yes, sex is one big red flag of cheating but emotionally cheating is just as bad if not worse. I very strongly agree that if you do happen to find yourself interested in someone else then you need to take the time to end your current relationship before pursuing things any further and moving on to the next one. It is not fair to the person you are currently with if you are in love with someone behind their back, regardless of whether or not you're being intimate with that person. Too many people don't stop to think of the pain and heartache they cause their current partner by cheating on them. To me, it's not "all right" just because the forbidden couple in question ends up happily together in the end. Cheating is cheating and should not be put up on a pedestal as a paragon of what is romantic. We're definitely on the same page on this front! I happen to agree with you completely. Yes, as smbush said, you can’t choose when you will fall in love. However, I don’t think that Hollywood should be romanticizing what is essentially cheating and making it seem like it’s perfectly acceptable behavior. I also disagree that they didn’t do anything wrong simply because they were not intimate. Yes, sex is one big red flag of cheating but emotionally cheating is just as bad if not worse.

I very strongly agree that if you do happen to find yourself interested in someone else then you need to take the time to end your current relationship before pursuing things any further and moving on to the next one. It is not fair to the person you are currently with if you are in love with someone behind their back, regardless of whether or not you’re being intimate with that person. Too many people don’t stop to think of the pain and heartache they cause their current partner by cheating on them. To me, it’s not “all right” just because the forbidden couple in question ends up happily together in the end. Cheating is cheating and should not be put up on a pedestal as a paragon of what is romantic.

We’re definitely on the same page on this front!

]]> By: smbush http://mephistos.com/2009/12/13/an-affair-to-remember/comment-page-1/#comment-2239 smbush Mon, 14 Dec 2009 02:09:32 +0000 http://www.mephistos.com/?p=2097#comment-2239 Well, I see what you're getting at, and in general, I agree with you. But I have to disagree in regards to this particular movie. Now, granted, I'm a bit naive when I watch romantic comedies. Unless they fade out as the main characters are kissing in a bedroom, or they show them actually having sex, I assume they have abstained. And I don't remember there ever being a hint of that in this movie. Like I said though, maybe I overlooked it. But if they were never intimate, I don't see that they did anything wrong. You can't choose when you will fall in love. Not to mention, being trapped on a boat makes it difficult to avoid someone. Oh, and I don't think she ever intentionally skips out on any meetings with him. She just won't contact him to tell him why she didn't show up. But then, their agreement was that they would be there if they could. Ah, romance... Well, I see what you’re getting at, and in general, I agree with you. But I have to disagree in regards to this particular movie. Now, granted, I’m a bit naive when I watch romantic comedies. Unless they fade out as the main characters are kissing in a bedroom, or they show them actually having sex, I assume they have abstained. And I don’t remember there ever being a hint of that in this movie. Like I said though, maybe I overlooked it.

But if they were never intimate, I don’t see that they did anything wrong. You can’t choose when you will fall in love. Not to mention, being trapped on a boat makes it difficult to avoid someone.

Oh, and I don’t think she ever intentionally skips out on any meetings with him. She just won’t contact him to tell him why she didn’t show up. But then, their agreement was that they would be there if they could. Ah, romance…

]]> By: rcornish http://mephistos.com/2009/12/13/an-affair-to-remember/comment-page-1/#comment-2237 rcornish Sun, 13 Dec 2009 18:14:37 +0000 http://www.mephistos.com/?p=2097#comment-2237 Okay, so I messed it up a bit. But there was a chance for meeting beyond that where she specifically skips out, right? That being aside, I agree about the romance and find myself drawn to romance just as you describe and beyond that. This however never examines the hurt that is caused to others and in this case there is the sin and all the hurt for the others almost from the very beginning, but in the "fantasy" that is this movie they are all happy and even encouraging of the relationship - that was more the point I was trying to make and seem to have missed in there somewhere. Okay, so I messed it up a bit. But there was a chance for meeting beyond that where she specifically skips out, right? That being aside, I agree about the romance and find myself drawn to romance just as you describe and beyond that. This however never examines the hurt that is caused to others and in this case there is the sin and all the hurt for the others almost from the very beginning, but in the “fantasy” that is this movie they are all happy and even encouraging of the relationship – that was more the point I was trying to make and seem to have missed in there somewhere.

]]> By: Odette http://mephistos.com/2009/12/13/an-affair-to-remember/comment-page-1/#comment-2235 Odette Sun, 13 Dec 2009 17:34:57 +0000 http://www.mephistos.com/?p=2097#comment-2235 First, she stands him up because she is stuck by the car on the way to the Empire State Building. Being hospitalized puts a kink into your appointment schedule. That being said...you can blame the medieval troubadours. Courtly love was between people who were not married to each other. The romance genre is derived from the literature of the Chivalric period. Finally, it is a fantasy. The Romantic gets its power from the forbidden and it always ends before we can see the conclusion. The only exception I can recall is "The Notebook." First, she stands him up because she is stuck by the car on the way to the Empire State Building. Being hospitalized puts a kink into your appointment schedule.

That being said…you can blame the medieval troubadours. Courtly love was between people who were not married to each other. The romance genre is derived from the literature of the Chivalric period.

Finally, it is a fantasy. The Romantic gets its power from the forbidden and it always ends before we can see the conclusion. The only exception I can recall is “The Notebook.”

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